Breakthrough

For those of you who have read these notes for a while know, I place an importance on quitting (see my March 6 [if you are reading this on my blog]or 7th [if you are reading on facebook] note of 2008). It isn't that one quits what they are doing or the breakthrough they are trying to get, its that they quit trying to get breakthrough through their own spiritual efforts. There has been numerous times in my life that certain things I thought I was good at disappeared. I couldn't function that way anymore. While some might say that I was under spiritual attack and just needed to press through it or whatever, the reality is that generally I started to walk in pride over that area or build an identity about how I had that breakthrough. I remember doing that with thinking I was bold and then I was as fearful as could be. Then I realized that boldness is not something I possess, but something God gives me through relationship. When I walk in pride or create a false identity, it is not that God is a mean God and tries to take things from me. The reality is that I never really possessed it and I moved away from His blessing. It is like there is a river of His blessing where the combination of my brokenness and desperation meets His goodness enabling breakthrough. However, lest I think that I can take credit for it, or even think that my formula of brokenness and desperation caused God to work, I will be mistaken and realize that the breakthrough I perceived to be my own never was my own. Perhaps when people say that there is an ebb and a flow to God's Spirit what they are really referring to is there being and ebb and a flow to them living in God's river of breakthrough. It isn't that God's Spirit decides to ebb today as much as we through a false identity and pride have pulled ourselves from the river. I think this is why I sometimes get concerned about people pressing in to get victory. It isn't that one claims their victory enough by decleration that it convinces God to give it to them (although declaring the truth over one's life can be extremely valuable. God is so good. He wants me to have and live in breakthrough even more than I want to have it. However, He wants us to fall in love with Him more than the breakthrough. The breakthrough has to lead us to Him more and more or else we were only using Him.

There is a danger in talking of the importance of quitting when most of the church hasn't even begun to wake up to what pressing in is. To tell someone to quit by their own efforts when they think pressing in is moving from 15 minutes to 30 minutes in their quiet time is ridiculous. They have "not yet begun to fight." In the same way, there are those that think confession and repentance are the same thing. I have noticed that quite a few times (note: certainly NOT all of the time) when I don't feel forgiven after confession it is because repentance has not truly taken place. Repentance being defined as truly being willing to do anything, change any part of life, talk to any person that might be able to help us, ask forgiveness of anyone, and so forth. The reality is that most aren't broken or desperate enough to be free. And often they try to read the Bible to come up with reasons of why they were not meant to be free (like viewing their issue to be their thorn in the flesh or whatever). The reality is that there is no desperation to be free. Breakthrough was meant to cause people to fall in love with the one who gives breakthrough. Because the breakthrough is His, not theirs. They just allign with it. So one can only indirectly cause breakthrough. It comes from God. One can keep themselves from it through pride, lack of relationship, or whatever. But it is ultimately a gift from Him. It is there that one gets to be in the river of living in His breakthrough. Therefore, breakthrough is not something I press into as much as die to get into. The Bible talks about that the harvest comes after the seed dies in the ground. I think there is a danger in having a huge plan for harvest with no death. A lot of times the brokenness allows one to live in the river. While it is important to have a vision for one's life and so forth, the reality is that if the vision is about me and trying to get God to accomplish my vision, I have missed the whole point. One needs to hold on tight to their vision against those who would belittle it or the doubts or fears that could come. However, one needs to keep a very loose grip on their vision with the Lord and even perhaps amongst some of the unbiased, wise people that one might allow to speak into their life (if they don't have an agenda to be gained by talking you into their way). The idea of me always pressing in for my breakthrough and wondering why God is holding out on me or feeling like if I just did one more think to impress God into giving me my breakthrough might not be a very biblical one, though. I think it also concerns me because whenever I get too focused on my breakthrough I tend to not care as much about others and have a harder time rejoicing in their breakthroughs (i.e. people tend to become valuable to me as they help me to accomplish my breakthrough even if it is a good spiritual thing to have).

To summarize all of this, Blessed are the poor in Spirit... for they shall see God.