But I think virtually every major victory in my life has come after realizing that I am 100% powerless to bring it to pass, but unwilling to give up in believing God for it. I think while I think I still can do something and I have some flicker of hope in something other than God, He often lets me discover that that is false hope. But when I go to Him with absolute desperation with all of the chips on the table in because I have to Him see His victory come to pass in me or to impact others (focus being that then whether or not it comes through me) is when things begin to change. God is so much better than we think. I wonder if it is that He just a) wants to see if we really care about nothing more than His kingdom to advance and His righteousness or if it will just be a nice addition to our already busy lives and b) that we know that we are absolutely powerless to actually do that. It is impossible to be good at something that I can not do. But the Lord always sends fire to those that make themselves a sacrifice. There is a difference in desperation. There are many desperate people for breakthrough on this planet. If need moved the heart of God, revival would be a non-stop occurence in hospitals, prisons, etc. However, for whatever reason it seems to be that desperation for Him is what moves Him. Praise the Lord for His love in hearing the cries of those that are desperate!!