Purpose and Dreams

For those of you that are unfamiliar with Bethel Church culture, there is a large emphasis on one's dream that the Lord has put in their heart. As a second year student the dreams of how to change the 7 mountains of society (if you are unfamilar with this idea please read about it here... it will be worth your time http://www.reclaim7mountains.com/) to bring about revival is talked about VERY regularly. I think the Lord is moving around in me related to this...

This past summer, I was blessed. I got to start living my dream. Since when I had cancer, I always wanted the Lord to put a grace on my life for healing ministry. This last year was when I really started to see that grace come. Yet, as I know from all sorts of experiences, there is no dream that brings fulfillment, it only comes from the Lord and doing His will. Healing Services are His will, right? I mean that's the dream that He put in my heart, and it sure looks like He is empowering it right? Then why did by the end of the summer I started losing some of my contentment. I would see God move powerfully, lives are changed, and I am having a good time. But the complete contentment and joy that I started with had let up just a bit. Not a ton. Just a bit. I think because I was getting so busy pursuing God for healing and ministering so much I just needed time to get back to the One who gives purpose (which in my mind is closely linked to contentment). Also, there IS a difference (albeit, not huge) between the dreams I have and the dreams the Lord has for me.

The best way to tell this is to come back to School. Now, not ministering as much, I have a quiet season. On top of that I received prophetic words about a season of rest (which my body really needed after how busy my last year has been). And all of a sudden as I come back and don't allow myself to run around and pray for everything that moves (although I still did a little here and there), I realize that I start to feel I lack purpose. Because I had associated purpose with my dream. As I am doing my dream and going after it at a hundred miles an hour, I feel much more purpose. But if I am not doing the dream and am told I need to be in a season of rest (minus the two conferences and a few healing outbreaks here and there - I couldn't help myself - God just loves to heal people :) ), I realize I start to feel like I lack purpose. And now I see why it was so important that I rested for this season. I wouldn't have gotten this any other way.

First of all, I needed to change the way I encountered God. Rather than pursuing Him in order to see a lot of "stuff" happen, I need to pursue Him just for the sake of enjoying Him as a primary purpose. Bill Johnson mentioned that as He preached this morning and God has been showing me that repeatedly in the past month or so. As I am with the One who is the source of purpose, I again get refreshed to me what His purpose is for today. His purpose can not be limited to what my dream is, otherwise, if I am not doing my dream, I would lack purpose. God's purpose for me today might be to serve and do something not-so-glamorous like help stack chairs after school. Just to make a point - that probably is not my dream for the day - that is why it is not fair to always equivocate the dream God has put inside of me with His dream. If each day gets approached from the standpoint of falling in love with the Source of purpose, I will always have purpose regardless of whether I am currently engaging in my dream or not. It will also allow contentment, peace, and thanksgiving for the opportunities that God gives to do His purposes (which honestly looks more like taking my eyes off of me and what I am doing and looking around to see what needs to be done and/or where I feel God's compassion rise up in me). I really believe that the Christian life looks far more like connecting with the heart of God and letting His compassion flow through to impact those around me than it looks like ministering and/or working on my dream (or the dream that He has put in me) and feeling without purpose and like I am wasting time if I am not.

Obviously, this is a different dimension to dreaming than might normally get presented. I certainly agree with the importance of having big dreams and so forth (I might need to grow more in this). But it is important to not only dream big, but to be able to live that dream today - hope deferred isn't a good thing according to Proverbs. Utimately, one can do that if they are living God's dream for the day. I also think the dream needs to be simplified. If a dream is grandiose, than make it simple. I want to see people healed. I do have bigger dreams than that of how it may look, but the long and the short of it is that I do not want people to have to live in pain, with health conditions, etc. So I don't have to wait for Bill Johnson to give me a call to invite me to do conferences with him. I can pray for the person at the grocery store and see God heal them now. Because my dream is for God to heal people because I want them set free... not because I want to have a large crowd at my meetings. This purifies things because I realize I only want numbers because it means more people are touched, not based on some idea that more means that I will be happier or validates me or my ego in some way. I am really convinced that dreams have to be empowered by love for others for God to really delight in empowering them. While they are all about me, I'll probably just be frustrated at God and why He isn't empowering them. But if I care more that the dream gets accomplished than that I am the one doing it is when I really start to see breakthrough... because then it is motivated by love and not about me. This again goes back to getting God's purpose. I find if I fervently intercede for the people before a healing service or going out on the streets, there is much more breakthrough than fervent prayer for me. Because God empowers love. And it takes me out of the equation so He can flow through.

So, too summarize, at my current level of understanding - maybe a bunch of people will straighten me out - I think we can always feel content and with purpose through alligning with doing what God's purpose is and through, in some smaller way, doing that aspect of the dream. And God shows us ways to do that too... I might not have as many healing services as there was last summer (honestly, between Seminary and School of the Supernatural, I don't really have too much time), but I can go after seeing a bunch of first year students getting activated... always fun and what I enjoyed so much about the healing services!